The Project

DISCLAIMER: Despite the URL of this blog, this is a blog written in English. The URL is an inside joke, to be understood by friends who read the following.

I love the summer. I hate the summer.

There are few things as exhiliarating as the brightness of the sun in the sky, as sensuous as the iciness of sweat trickling down your back, and as breathtaking as the colours of nature in bloom. It never fails to put a smile on my face.

In the 22 summers of my life, I can't call a single one as memorable. In middle and high school, my summer vacations were 3-4 months long... and all I ever did was laze around at home and watch TV or read books. Yet every summer began with this huge plan of all the wonderful things I would do...

...as will this summer. But this time it's going to be different. Different because of what happened last summer. The most meaningful relationship I've ever had ended... some say it was probably too good to be true, others say it was for the best. Regardless, I've been recovering from that for the past year. Most outsiders would think it was a very unlikely coupling - our personalities were worlds apart, as were a lot of our interests. If someone asked me why I loved this girl so much when I was dating her, I'd probably give a very lame and unconvincing answer. Since then, after months of painfully reliving past memories, I finally have the answers to that question. Amongst them, probably the most important was her honesty. Most of my friends, and almost everyone I know, have always praised me, or at the very least not said negative things about me. But this girl was different - she always called me out on my faults, always saw through any fakeness I had. Sometimes it was enough to drive me mad. But most of the time, it made my day thinking that this beautiful and fascinating creature would hug me for comfort & love at the end of the day. It was because of that honesty that today I walk straight (literally - I'm a hunchback), don't interrupt others when speaking, don't speak too loudly in public and a whole lot of other good things. Thanks :)

There was one fault that she made me painfully aware of - more after we broke up than before. My apathy. I'm known to be a very calm person, and someone who everyone gets along with. You know why? Because I'm very indifferent to a lot of things - I'll easily ignore your faults, your insults - how can you not get along with someone like that? But what most people don't realize that I'm also subconsciously apathetic to the time we spend together - chances are, 4 years from now, I'll remember very little of our time together (this doesn't apply to my close friends though!). My apathy applies to all aspects of my life - be it the books I read, movies I watch, places I go to, things I achieve, everything. She made me realize how blindly I was walking through life... how I was wasting away all my summers.

I watched a trailer for an upcoming movie very recently - it's called Julie & Julia (lol - those who know me will know why that's funny). It's about this girl (Julie) who decides to cook a new dish everyday for 365 days based on Julia's cook book, and writes a blog about it (true story btw - check out the blog). My initial plan was to watch a brand new movie everyday of the summer and write about it in my blog, but I finally settled on something different.

So it's my wasted summers, my most beloved ex, and a movie trailer that brings me to this: The Project. It's nothing unique - like all past summers, it's a plan of doing a lot of wonderful things. These wonderful things are very hazy in my mind as of right now, but as days progress, I know it'll become clearer. However, the following are things I certainly want to complete (again, a lot of these things are motivated by what my ex taught me about me):

• Complete Master's Proposal


• Create an absolutely fantastic website (that's right Shawn, you're part of the project!)


• Read a lot of books, watch a lot of movies - but with differently this time (you'll see what I mean soon)


• Bring myself up-to-speed with what's happening in the world


• Lose a ton of weight (ignoring my diabetes has made me gain quite a bit!)


• Draw a lot


• Get a driver's license (hope my ex reads this one!)


• Cook a lot of food


• Save money (some more on this very soon)


• Learn some french

I guess that's the list for now - highly doubt I'll be adding much to it. Everyday (ideally), or at least every other day, I will be posting a new entry (short ones) about my progress and plans on the Project. The blog's really less about sharing and more a way of motivating myself, but everyone's more than welcome to follow my journey this summer. And feel free to leave comments - but above all, wish me luck!